Free Chimp Genome!!

Finally my years of toil in the lab will at last have a genome to refer to and conduct strange genetic experiments on. You too can also get your free copy of the chimp genome for use as a spray on aftershave or as a small battleship to protect you from the evil gorilla invasion. So don't wait, order your copy now and be forever grateful that you too can look at a chimp and go "i know what's in your genome".